i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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