Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
You had me at "let me see your balls"
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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