the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
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