my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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