i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
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