so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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