If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
