At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
