every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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