Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
