8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
