I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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