bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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