I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
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at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
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Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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