What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i love accidental penises.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
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