big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
