I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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