It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
