i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
he thought i was a dude.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Randomize
