she was so not down for the gang bang
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
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worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
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You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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