My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
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