You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Help me help you realize you are a moron
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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