Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
