it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
where am i from again
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
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just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize