You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize
