just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
