I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
