Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
