good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
