Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
