The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I got her a Nickelback box set.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Help. Why am I so naked?
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