Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize