It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Randomize