And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize