I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
