He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize