do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
