Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
