she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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