You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
