Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
no you cant smoke seaweed
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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