no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
