you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
