it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
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I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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