New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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