My brain says no but my pants say off.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I touched a dick in church today
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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