we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
