you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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