Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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