you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
