i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Randomize
